Secret January morning I realized tonight this might not be our year. You asked something of me I had not heard of before of course I’m here to answer. Admire the garden with me pretend you understand my meaning. Don’t underestimate this chance I can easily leave things exactly how we’d left things long before we met up again tonight our game board and its pieces strewn about on an already swept floor. I’d much rather prefer being in some dizzying free fall controlling the vertigo not on my own anymore. I can easily use time filling out pages in the miles of my diary that I’ll eventually hand over for your Royal inspection. I just hope in the end you’ll be there hovering standing at the foot of my bed telling my boys stories about their father. The handsome gentle side an insecure stranger not letting many get too close. Play my favorite song “How Soon is Now.” by Morrissey. Watch me from your invisible shell there’s something pretty about you, this, I’ve long since accepted the voyeuristic side. You’ve always been safe keeping to the shadows. Fill your pockets with my poems, God knows I’ve given you enough to read for a lifetime or more. In other words, you’ll always have something to fall asleep by to figure out my meaning My Gift to You.