This Mood of Mine

Up against this mood tonight. 



I’ve tried a thousand times

to simply get up and forget

I ever fell in love with her.



That’s when

the trouble starts.

I close my eyes to forget

and it starts all over again.



I dream.



I can’t quite,

control that world.

A diluted place

left fearful searching

out of breathe in a panic

looking for her.



And no matter

how hard I try

I can’t quite

ever catch up to her.

I can’t open my eyes

and just stop.



Instead,

I avoid sleeping.

Always lost,

out searching

each and every night.

I ask for one simple wish

whispered secretly

of course.



I’m Centered squarely,

in my perfect praying position,

down on broken knees

to palms.

I ask

bless and find me,

please.

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